Jujubes

Jujubees.  Green Jujubees.  That is what I want right now.  But I can't have them.  Oh, I can have them later if I still want them but by that time I won't want them anymore.  That's the way things always seem to work out for me.  We have tons of candy here.  I don't mean to brag but I'm the one in charge of the snack fund here.  What I say goes when it comes to candy and other assorted snacks.  I do all of the purchasing. I do all of the stocking.  If somebody wants any kind of candy, I'm the man to come to.  I guess I'm the Candyman.  So I am the only one to blame for there not being any Jujubes down here.  See, the thing is if there were Jujubes down here I probably wouldn't want them.  I don't think anyone ever really wants Jujubes.  The main source of the Jujube empire's funds come from those stupid little quarter fed machines outside of Wal-Mart or inside your barbershop.  Those filthy machines that are probably loaded by dirty truckers who pick their nose the whole ride over and don't wash their hands after going to the bathroom.  They are what the Jujube makers thrive on.  But for some unknown reason I have a fucking craving for green, GREEN Jujubes.  Not one of those red ones that try to taste like cherry but really taste like cough syrup, not one of those yellow ones whose lemon flavor lacks punch and definitely not one of those orange ones that taste like tang with no sugar.  No I want green Jujubes.  The scrumptious lime flavored  chewy candy that is sweet enough to fulfill the diabetes that I don't have yet sour enough to make the back of my tongue dry up and develop bumps.  That is what would make me happy right now.

Or a girl.  And not one of these Hawaiin girls with fake blue or purple or green eyes and twenty other guys on her list.  And not a red-head who likes to get naked everywhere and show off all 13 of her below the waist piercings.  And definitely not that one whose already caused me too much heartache to endure.  No, I want a sweet girl.  I want a sweet down to earth girlthat enjoys the little things in life.  A girl that has as much love to give as I do.  A girl that is open-minded and likes my choice of movies or at least watches them and then argues with me about why she doesn't like them.  I want a girl just as spontaneous and erratic as myself.  I want A girl, not ten that all bug me in one way or another.  Just one that doesn't bug me at all and will sit by the fireplace or burning notebooks in the corner of my room this winter with me drinking hot chocolate and eating smores, watching thought provoking films and then wrestling with me.  Why don't I get these girls anymore?  Are there any left?  Or do I just come off as a man-whore and scare them away?  I'm not sure but somewhere along the line the sweet girls disappeared from my life or stopped looking at me as a possible mate. 

So I'm left with these other ones.  The desperate blonde that hugs and kisses me without any indication that I'm into her and the Russian who comes over to watch movies in skimpy shorts wagging her tail and thinks that I am all about her when I'm not.  The unattainable Hawaiian.  The insecure Asian.  The pierced red-head.  The rebounding bartender.  The "free-spirited" ex... And what I'm ultimately left with in the end is nothing.  I'm left looking for the next girl that may wind up filling my heart with joy causing bumps on the back of my tongue but will probably end up just being added to the list of unwanted Jujubees.